Just need a slight rant and no worries if no one replies.
I was talking to my mum last night and saying that I'm quite pleased that she's not contributing financially as I can ask her opinion and get her input but without her dictating everything (this stemed from me going to 1 of my BMs mums house on Tuesday - she's getting married in Ocrtober and her mum's paying so her mum is trying to run the day!) I then said that I'm staying at this BM's house the night before her wedding so my BM's will be staying at mums the night before mine.
Mum replied with 'all 3 of them?!' and you could hear the shock. 1 of my BMs lives in Paris so has nowhere else to stay, my MOH wanted to stay at mums as I told her that she couldn't bring the kids to the wedding so she was quite happy about being able to enjoy the night before if she's offloading them for the whole weekend and my 3rd BM is the girl who's getting married in Oct. Mum and dad live in a tiny bungalow and I won't share my bed the night before so mum reckons there's no room for all 3 of them to sleep on the floor (she might have a point to be fair!) She then said, you haven't talked to your dad about this, what's he going to do? And you've not asked us if we mind them all staying here.
We left it with mum saying she was tired and she'd talk to me today. I've rung her this morning to see how she is and she said she'd spoken to dad (I'm an only child) and dad thought he'd get to spend the night before he gives me away with me and mum. He was expecting to take us out for a nice meal and spend quality time together. I think this is a lovely idea and now I know dad wants to do this, I want to too (dad rarely gets all emotional and sentimental)
So now I need to ask my MOH if not only does she mind not staying - will she have my other BM to stay at hers! ARGH!! I'm feeling fed up trying to appease everyone - I still wish we'd jumped on a plane and got married abroad. What do I do with my Paris BM if my MOH won't have her?? I've already given in and let the Paris girl be a BM as she just about begged! Mum said we'll put her in a hotel if my MOH won't have her!
Honestly, I just feel really down today about it all and I know compared to some of you, this is trivial but I don't want this big white wedding. Steve does hence us doing it but he doesn't have to deal with any part of it.
OK - moan over xx
18 Aug 2011 at 13:14
• Wedding will be in June 2012
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Member of finalstitch.co.uk since 1 February 2011
Added 566 forum messages and 2 albums.
Bedfordshire.
missengaged
Aw hun! Keep calm, and don't worry! If you have decided you want to stay at your Mum and Dads just by yourself (for your Dad saying it and you realising this is your preferred option) then go with it! Your MOH and b/maids will have to understand and respect your change of mind! It's no big deal as they are there to support you so should! The one from Paris can just stay in a hotel near by (if you other b/m can't put her up) and I don't think you should have to pay for it!! (Especially since she literally begged) Other girls on here may have a better suggestion but I just feel it is all about YOU so have it as you want it!! I am def coming to realise though that planning a wedding is simple.....it's other people that make it stressful!! x
Member of finalstitch.co.uk since 29 January 2011
Added 262 forum messages.
Doncaster, South Yorkshire.
Wedding will be on 16 June 2012 At Wortley Hall (Sheffield / Barnsley), South Yorkshire
laraandsteve@missengaged Thanks. I just feel bad for putting mum and dad in a position that they didn't want to be in and then mum got all tearful (she seems to be doing that a lot!) I know it's about us as B2B but it feels sometimes that we're all trying to keep everyone else happy! 1 of Steve's best men is going to be a dad in April, great news but seen the wife today and she said, they might not stay the night at the venue. I understand why but it's just another thing that makes me feel a bit disheartened! I think I need to forget about weddings for a bit and think shoes instead x
18 Aug 2011 at 13:29
• Wedding will be in June 2012
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kookiebek
Member of finalstitch.co.uk since 31 July 2010
Added 433 forum messages and 7 albums.
Worcestershire.
kookiebek
Ok so you are having the bridal stress a little bit earlier than I did, but the same thing happened to me,I ended up at some point trying to please everyone and it just doesn't work!
There is no point stressing about it until you have managed to talk to your MOH (I assume as your MOH she is your best friend and will probably be very understanding of how you are feeling?) and seeing what she has to say. The idea your dad has sounds lovely and although I had a big group around, this way sounds lovely too.
Perhaps see if you can see these girls in the afternoon (when all the mad rush is over) and enjoy a bit of time with them before going out with your parents..it will be busy but they will see that you are making the effort to see them aswell?
Also I don't know about your friend but I always get excited at the thought of being pampered in a hotel so you might find she likes the idea of this too?
Please don't stress, it will right itself in the end I promise, you will end up having the best day of your life, trust me x
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