Things people who aren't planning weddings don't get...

essex_bride  Oh I have had so many of those moments too hun...

- The Childrens Menu is for the " Children Only" Not Adults, you have your own menu to choose from so stop being so fussy!

-Yes the RSVP date was put on the invitation for a reason!

- Yes we have a gift list, didnt you see the card within the invitation providing you with all the details for it? Yes those details on that little bit of card... the piece of card that says Gift List
- You wouldn't find our wedding gift list on the Debenhams site as its with Next, it was on the card in the invitation.

- No you cannot bring your four Children ( To Mark Cousin )...Were there names on the invitation?...We have space limits, we had to draw the line somewhere and the fact your four children dont understand the meaning of behave... and I begrudge paying over £300 for them to come when we hardly know them

- ( To another of marks cousins) So you cannot find a baby sitter within the next four months then? actually do they even need one seeing they are 14 and 15 years old, Do they not have friends they could spend the day with?

Dont you just love people xx

emma23  my only problem at the mo is people assuming they can bring a guest i may sound like a cow but if the invite doesent say plus one then dont do it. my budget is small so im gonna go bridezilla on people if it keeps happening x

dora2011  haha! love this question, my mother is definetly one for these types of questions!! she cant understand why cant have an extra guest or two...when our venue is TINY...so aswell as wedding planning i have to get planning permission, bricks and mortar AND BUILD AND EXTENSION

happybee  Yes I have had one so far....No your new boyfriend cannot sit at the top table, why would you even think this an acceptable question to ask? *Sigh*

sebsbride  These are the ones that have wound me up the most:

Father in law to be: No you shouldn't wear white as you already live with Seb (H2B)

Mother in law to be: Normally the bride goes from her parents and the groom from his. OHHH but you can't do that as you are together already. Hmmm we will have to do it anonother way, oh dear! HOW ABOUT OH DEAR TO YOU BEING MY MOTHER IN LAW!!!!!!

missm24  haha, Love this! I dont really have people asking these kinds of things however I do have a sister in law who seems to think it is her wedding not mine and comes out with all sorts of crazy statements which floor me every time they come out of her mouth!
I was sixteen when she got married and being a very shy and self consious girl I didnt really like being a bridesmaid,(that and the fact my dress was about two sizes too big) she claims that I ruined her day as I got changed for the evening reception, and that there is not many photos I look comfortable in,(however nobody else says this) she has informed me that she is going to get her revenge by looking misserable in all my photos and changing into an outragous outfit for the evening, I know for most this may sound like she is having a laugh however I can asure you she is not.
To make things worse we are going abroad for my hen weekend, I had specifically said that I just wanted to chill out get a tan and have some fun with my closest friends whilst going out at night, im up for bit of sillyness.

she e mailed everyone bar me saying that she wanted everyone to dress up in sexy facny dress and dress me up in a hideous wedding dress, as my friends know me well they knew I would hate this and said no, she then replied saying that it was tough and she was dressing up weather I would like it or not, as she wants to be a princess! so basically taking the attention away from me and my friends having fun and on to her. Getting the pattern here??
Very annoying!

heggy  We're not getting married in "the bride's parrish" becuase I haven't lived there for 10 years!!

katiedarlin  why its not ok for my brother who is not a groomsman or bestman (as iain chose his boys and i chose my girls and we decided not to have eachothers siblings)to wear exactly the same thing as the groom and groomsmen....however he still is because he cried...a 22 year old man crying cos he didnt want to look different...grr

aisling  What is about weddings that make usually realtively sane people act like self obsessed crazy idiots?

Thankfully we've been ok so far, think it helps that we don't live close to any family, my lot are in Ireland, Sam's about an hour away, so we're planning it alone but with a bit of input here and there. All your stories are crazy, what a bunch of nutters!

unbunchkin  We gave our witness his invite the other night, he opened it and said 'Oh, is Maddy not invited?' Oh, would this be Maddy, your ex-girlfriend of SIX MONTHS? Whom we haven't seen in longer than that? No, no she isn't invited!
Also, my cousin & his wife who have spat their dummy out over not being invited to the day by saying well, we're not coming at all then - ok, you're not coming at all.
I'm sure people don't understand that is like another £500 to add you and your children on! You can come if you're happy to pay for it!

raewright  The worst I've had is my H2Bs mother inviting random people I've never met to the ceremony, even though we have absolutely no spare seats. I'm getting annoyed with people assuming their invites are +1 but not on the same level you ladies are. I suddenly feel a little better!

tassarella  To the Grandfather of the Groom - I don't care what tradition you hold by, no I am not getting married in my 'home' parish because both me and my fiance live 200 miles away from there. I also don't care what tradition states, you asked us what we would like for a wedding present, we replied 'contributions to our honeymoon', this apparantly wasn't acceptable so just buy us whatever you think is for crying out loud...I really don't care as long as you turn up.

To the Mother of the Groom - If you don't feel comfortable wearing make-up don't wear it (to be fair she did phrase this question 'I'm sure this is the last thing on your mind...'.

To the Mother of the Bride - No you cannot just show up on the day if you feel like it. I have to give final numbers to the venue and caterers 2 weeks before the date of the wedding. Whilst you are my Mum and I love you no I cannot deal with your drama at the moment and would really like you to make your mind up already.

To friends who are asking me what I am currently doing with my time (uni finished for me a week ago and I haven't started work yet)...uh planning a wedding!!! People do not get how much time it takes.

To just about everyone - No I do not care that H2B's cousins wedding is the month after ours. We haven't asked for any contributions etc so how can you tell us that it is not fair on the family as two weddings in one year is too expensive. If people want to come then they are welcome to come. If they feel that it is too much for them well they don't have to. If I had my way we would have run off and got married on our own, but no we were not allowed to do this as it would upset the family...please tell me how I can please everyone!!!!

mrsegan2b  No, your 18 month old daughter is not invited, that's why she is not named on the invitation. No, you can't bring your newborn, that is why your invite says "Adults Only" "No, there is not a free bar, I am already paying for you to have a 5 course meal complete with wine and champagne", "No, I have no idea how you will get home if you don't drive, that is your problem!"

littlemissshowoff  The main problem I had was with my MIL deciding she was coming in the wedding car with me! No, you're not!!! You're going in the car with your son - the groom! Up until the day before she was still going on about that and I had to get my husband to tell her very firmly that she wasn't!

mrsdulley2b  @heggy I have had people say that they want to know whats on the menue as they might not like it and asking if they can eat something else. I also have 5 people asking what colour the bridesmaids are wearing so that they can match. Also if they can wear jeans t-shirts and trainers because they don't wear suits.

mrspage2b  we have had our hissy fits over my sister she wanted her wedding 3 weeks after mine hers isnt booked and she has already called it off once so yes i have booked mine yes i have the hall you wanted but have now decided you cant afford and yes my wedding is much bigger than yourse not because i want to do 1 better but becayse its what i want i want a church wedding . why should it be in a catholic church mum i mean when was the last time you actaly went to church ??

mrsdulley2b  @unbunchkin This is what we have told people if your really that interested in coming its £95 each, They soon decide to stick to just the evening.

quoth_the_raven  Ha. No, mother-in-law, you don't get to wear the same colour as the bridesmaids. You are not a bridesmaid. You in fact have your own role at the wedding, which is Mother of the Groom. No, most of Steff's family, we actually don't care whether you approve of us having a civil ceremony instead of a church wedding. Please don't leave me narky, prissy little comments on Facebook. Astonishingly, brother-in-law, if you publically declare that I think I'm God you do actually have to apologise before you're invited to the wedding again, and yes, this is actually upsetting more people than just you. Such as your brother. And mother. And the rest of your family.

And for the love of all that is holy, if one more person tells me what I "should" do for the wedding (as in the phrase "Oh, you should have this song at your wedding") I will actually start swinging. I've never liked the term 'Bridezilla', but these days I just feel it's a massively unfair title given that the Bridezilla is a creature of everyone else's making.

@sebsbride If it helps the situation, you could always point out to you FOG that the tradition of wearing white to a wedding was nothing to do with virginity; that's a false assumption that surfaced a century or two later. It was actually the colour of choice to show wealth - it was bloody expensive to get white cloth because of the amount of work that went into bleaching the stuff, and then keeping it clean. Your living in sin is irrelevant.

tassarella  @quoth_the_raven completely agree that a bridezilla is made by those around her!! I mean seriously, I am planning this entire day and the most you can think about is that I haven't actually organised a hotel room for you?!?! or you are worried you won't have lost enough weight to make you feel good in time?!?! or that even though you agreed to be an usher you still don't understand why you have to be at the church before everyone else and show people to their seats!!! We have 35 guests, its not that bloomin difficult for crying out loud and I've even drawn you a friggin diagram of the church and where the reserved seats are etc!!!! And there are two of you!!!!! grrrr there is my little rant for the day lol. On a plus note, trial of wedding hair went very well x

portsmouthjen  I love this thread! It's not been too bad for me so far but a work colleague did make a point of saying that she might organise transport for her and some others seeing as there isn't any laid on for getting home from the reception.
Cheek!

mrsctobe  @portsmouthjen that is so rude! I can't believe they expect transport home! xx

jayneejayne  This is an excellent thread! I think my only one so far is H2B mum telling us we can go ahead and book our wedding abroad now she has decided she will come!! I took great pleasure in telling her we booked it months ago!!!

heggy  Please can you order me the same meal as everyone else, but half portions.... No, just leave half of it on the plate!!!

mrsctobe  "How do I book my room online?" Er, follow the instructions on the web page perhaps.......that was my older brother.....

mrsctobe  To be honest, we've had it pretty easy - the most helpful thing is the wedding website - we wrote everything out once and now just refer people to it......xx

jen150912  I am abso-bloody-lutely loving this thread!! I've had some crackers so far...

BM - 'But I'm allergic to chiffon' She clearly she doesn't wear cotton/polyester based clothes on a daily basis. God bless the dressmaker who has appeased her and is making the dresses top half satin, bottom half chiffon. I really don't care, as long as they look good.

MIL - 'I saw a lovely cream suit.' ehh naw.

Friend (who is a complete pain in the proverbial) 'How do we get home from Kilbirnie?? It's MILES away!' Actually no, it's the same distance from Renfrew as Glasgow is, just in the opposite direction. £10 in a taxi ya stingy cow, I'm not doing a bus both ways.

Same friend - 'Ohh I better have a man by your wedding!' Who says you're getting a plus one?

Different friend (on me being given wedding mags no longer needed from my cousin on a wkend in Edinburgh 'Jen you've got over a year to look at them, you don't need to now' Ehh actually I'm not taking a dozen wedding mags home on the train, I'm ripping out the bits I need. Shut yer face and go have a fag.

No doubt there will be more belters in the coming months...

And I wholeheartedly agree with @quoth_the_raven - if ppl would stop commenting on how 'it's ages away' and 'you've organised loads so far' then I wouldn't have to justify myself with my planning. Organisation does not a Bridezilla make! Although myself and @missengaged are halfway there xx

kookiebek  MIL,' You need to have your mother as a witness'- erm no don't think you get to decide that!!

MIL- Your mother will come down with me to the church so we can have a drink first before it starts- no, my mother will be in the car with me (cue disparaging look from MIL)

What are you doing for gift list- Look at the invitation!!! It tells you there!!!!

What hotels etc are there around you?- 1) look at my wedding website (address on invite) it has lots on it or 2) look on bloody google!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Haven't had too many others yet thank goodness!!!

bubs789  @jen150912

I just love the way you drag @missengaged into your rantings lol

I only had a couple, my brother, I dont eat desert I want a cheeseboard, me "it isnt on the menu" him, but I dont eat desert. " Thats really not my fault, I have spent ages picking the menu if you dont like it dont have one."

My uncle refused to give my cousin his invite because I hadn't invited his girlfriend who I cannot stand - I hated doing it but I did give in to that one.

missengaged  @jen150912- ha ha!! Yes bring me into it...ha ha!! This thread is brilliant though, cannot believe the audacity some people have to come out with some of the things they do!! I have been pretty lucky so far, but saying that haven't sent out invites so I'm sure nearer the time I will tearing my hair out along with most of you girls!! I have however had my own sister tell me not to invite h2b's brother (long story but they don't get along).....er hello, it's his brother!!x

meeeshel  we haven't really had many yet - the only one we've had was H2B's dad saying to his girlfriend, after she'd volunteered him to look after the dogs - "nooo, he'll be coming" her - "noo, don't be silly" him - "no of course he's coming, i'll get him an invite". this was like a conversation between them and they seemed to forget we were there!! me and H2B sat there and said nothing, both thinking the same thing - not bloody likely!! we don't know him, he won't know anyone and is like 18 so no way he'll want to come to a wedding of people he doesn't know!! we haven't had the conversation yet to tell him politely that he's not coming, we've decided if anyone complains about other halves etc not coming we're just saying that none of my extended family are coming due to numbers so if we had any spare, they'd go to them! x